A small helping of intimidation.

Eight weeks from today and I will have finished The London Marathon. Or at least I should have done by now. And I for one am now giving some thought to the possibility of having a right good panic.

I’ve been away on holiday this week. Before I got my place in the marathon I’d planned to exit stage left around the time of my birthday and spend a week sitting on my butt, sprawled out under the sun and just watch the world go by. So that’s what I did. And even better it fitted in nicely with my training schedule too. Neat huh?

Because it’s a rest week I’ve done four x 4 milers in an air conditioned gym. Normally I hate running in the gym – avoid it like the plague as it’s so mind numbingly boring – but this week it’s a necessity. Its 80 plus degrees here, complete with pretty intense humidity levels. Not conducive to running – let along walking at more than sloth like pace – outside.

I realised something this week – one afternoon whilst I was doing the hard yards on a treadmill – I’m intimidated by the idea of the marathon.

My ability to cope is good. I have the odd wobble every now and again – I am human after all 🙂 – however most social, personal and work situations don’t really phase me too much these days. Alas that hasn’t always been the case.

As a kid I was incredibly shy and meeting, talking and mixing with new people used to be a fraught experience at the best of times. These days it’s still a tad traumatic (a minor attack of the *shys* always kicks in – even for just a few minutes) however I usually sit back a little and suss the group dynamics out before diving in, therefore most people simply don’t realise what is actually going on in my head.

Similarly I use to go to great lengths to avoid having to stand up and talk in front of a group – I didn’t do being the centre of attention – nowadays you can’t hold me back if there’s a crowd me for to stand up in front of and share my two pence with.

So why the intimidation about running 26 and a bit miles? Is it the fact that I’ve no experience to draw from? Is it because I am worried I can’t actually physically do it? Is it because I lack confidence?

All of the above I suppose. And more.

I’m not sure what the answer is right now and how exactly I go about getting my head around this situation. There’s a couple of things that I am definitely going to throw in over the next couple of weeks; a half marathon for starters. That’ll give me something bite size that I know I can do and a firm target to set my training around.

More mileage too. I think a week off has had a slightly random effect – a good one in that I got to relax a little, but a bad one in that I don’t feel like I’ve achieved whilst being aware that this clock is till counting down… Or maybe that’s just me taking it all a little too seriously?!

Finally I think I need to find me a running buddy – I’m not so sure that running solo is the best idea on the planet. There’s a group that run out from near me every Wednesday night and do an hour or so of stamina and speed training in Hyde Park, and I think that could be a good starting place to find me a partner in crime as it were.

Advice, guidance, answers, suggestions etc – chuck ‘em on a postcard please folks – right now I think I could do with all the help I can get!!

And in other news: Its raining – in fact there’s a thunder storm and all sorts going on in Mauritius. Cant wait to get home 🙂

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